Friday, April 18, 2008

Why Insurance Brings No Assurance.

Lets just pretend that insurance companies didn't exist. Just for a moment, imagine what it might be like... Now, I know what you are probably thinking. There would be bigger medical bills to be paid by the average joe, heart palpatations at the thought of a mere fender-bender, and probably a lot less people willing to say their dying words peacefully (I mean, without life insurance.... whew!, dying is a whole lot scarier...). But you know what? Without insurance companies there would also be a whole lot less of my life wasted on the phone...listening to numerical menus being read aloud to me by some drugged-up sounding person that can't possibly exist with a voice like that... or cheesy "on hold" music... You know what I want to know? I want to know who chooses that music. I want to know who makes a decision that determines "jon bon jovi" to be suitable music to play for an individual who is slowly growing in agitation by the mili-second... and don't even get me started on those empty promises of how "my call is important to (insert said company here), and that they will assist me as soon as possible". If that was true, I would have been off the phone hours ago. I mean, come on. For something that is supposed to be so helpful, insurance can certainly be a royal pain in my arse.

There is a reason for this rant. This past week has been THE week for Courtney and insurance companies. It started with a notice from AIG, the insurance company that covers all of Sky Ranch's work related injuries. Apparently there had a been a mistake with a claim that had been filed when I had a recent doctor's visit. Instead of filing through my health insurance, they went through AIG. Thus, major confusion ensues. No, I wasn't hurt at work, I tell them. Yes, I am absolutely sure, I tell them. Yes, I think I would remember an 'at- work' injury, I tell them. Yes, I do need to refile, I tell them. Yes, I do need you to stop being so stupid, I think to myself. Geez.

Part two: Soon after this fiasco, a bill from my dentist's office arrives. You see, I recently had the extreme privelage of having my wisdom teeth removed. Talk about a good time (that's a whole other post). Well, upon my surgery, I payed my portion of the total cost and was told insurance would cover the rest. I guess I was wrong to think that insurance would actually..oh, i don't know, do what they were supposed to? When I opened up the bill, it took me only a moment to realize that insurance had only covered $50.40 of a much larger total. So, I place a call and apparently my dental insurance company is now requesting that I refile, both through my health insurance and then again through them. Are you serious? I don't even really know what that means.

Part three: So, I got in this car wreck a few weeks back. Alright, let's be honest- it was like two months back. Long enough to where the insurance portion of those shenanigans should have been taken care of. Well, this morning, surprise surprise, I receive a phone call from, yet again, another insurance company. The girl who hit me apparently finally filed her claim and NOW they want to know the details of the accident. Really? Well, let me see, give me a second to dig WAY back in my brain to tell you exactly how it happened. Again. Geez.

So, props to Gloria, Shawn, and Tiffany (the three reps. from various companies that I just got off the phone with)... I know that you are just doing your job, and I can't be mad at you for that. But I just have to say... If all things were as complicated as dealing with insurance companies, I might have opted to stay in the womb.

And that's all I have to say about that.

3 comments:

david said...

oh I get it, "insurance" rhymes with "assurance." that's why it's funny. heh heh love ya

CourtneyHope said...

david. sometimes you leave wierd comments. there. i said it.

david said...

but do you really feel better? :)